WWE Superstars results (10/9): Cesaro, the great entertainer, on Superstars again

The Big Takeaway: Cesaro was extremely entertaining in a 3-minute squash against Adam Rose. The Prime Time players beat The Ascension in a decidedly average main event.

Cesaro beat Adam Rose (3:30)

I mean it really shouldn’t be baffling in this company, but it really is – why is Cesaro on this show working with Adam Rose? The klaxon sound that they use at the Royal Rumble goes off, Cesaro’s music stops and Adam Rose appears on the ramp with a mic. He claims that Cesaro can’t “string a sentence together” and completely buried them both by asking “how does it feel to be here competing against Adam Rose” while the likes of Rollins, Kevin Owens are “megastars”?

Cesaro’s response to all this is to wait for the bell and then absolutely annihilate Rose with a running European uppercut to the corner. He follows this up with a press slam a la the Ultimate Warrior, where Rose just lands on his face, and then another uppercut. Rose dodges a third and then comes off the second rope with a missile drop kick into a cover for two. He begins to work over Cesaro’s neck and back with clubs and blows and then locks on a rear chin lock. Cesaro throws him off but charges into an elbow.

Rose is now doing the stomps that Shawn Michaels used to do before a super kick. He hits Cesaro with one and then goes for an airplane spin to mock Cesaro’s giant swing. Cesaro scoffs at it, no selling it and does a 36 rep giant swing which he slows down as if he’s going to stop at about 30 reps and then just picks him up and carries on. Cesaro is such a great entertainer; the crowd is just eating out of the palm of his hand. He then puts on the Sharpshooter for the win. To his credit, Adam Rose was good here too.

The Prime Time Players beat The Ascension (8:47)

Viktor and Darren Young lock up and test each other’s strength back and forth until a headlock takedown by Viktor breaks things up. Young slaps a headlock on and an arm ring by Viktor is reversed into a hammerlock by Young. Viktor runs into an elbow and tags in Konnor, who comes in to no sell everything and then shoulders Young to the mat. A blind tag from O’Neil brings him in to match up to Konnor’s brawn – he shoulder barges Konnor and scoop slams him and then hits him with a leg drop. Konnor rolls outside and Viktor comes in to start on O’Neil. He gets belly-to-back suplexed on the ring apron by Young, which looks like it really sucked, and we head to a break.

Viktor and Young are in together as we return. Young gets whipped into the corner and does a flip bump over the top rope. Outside, Konnor launches Young into the barricade and the ring apron. They come back in and he covers him for two. Young plays the babyface in peril as they double team him. Young is bleeding from his right shoulder. He goes for a victory roll up, but as he is doing it Konnor blind tags in on the way through. Konnor comes back in and leg drops Young and stomps on his face. Konnor puts on a chin lock and Viktor comes in. They use the ropes to slingshot Young and then go back to the chin lock.

O’Neil eventually gets the heat on Konnor. He steams in and shoulders barges Konnor to the mat and then clotheslines him, following it up with a big boot. He does his triple backbreakers on Viktor and then slings him aside. He charges at Konnor in the corner with a splash and then powerslams him. The pin broken up by Viktor, who is sent outside. As Titus turns round, he eats a big boot from Konnor and then his pin attempt is broken up by Young. Young and Viktor send each other over the top and when Konnor misses a charge to the corner, O’Neil capitalizes with the Clash of the Titus. A nothing match, it was what it was.