ROH Global Wars results: Two title matches

The Takeaways —

• Jay Lethal retained the ROH World title over Kenny King.
• SoCal Uncensored successfully defended the ROH Tag Team titles against the Super Smash Bros from Canada.
• The ringside area was crowded, but the rest of the venue looked close to empty on camera. 
• The final Global Wars show was a decent card with mostly good to very good matches. The crowd was high for the highs and dead for anything they viewed as taking up space. 

Show Recap —

Karen Q defeated Kaitlin Diemond in a Final Battle qualifying match

Ian Riccaboni and Colt Cabana were joined on commentary by Kelly Klein to announce this match. The ringside area was packed, but the bleachers were virtually empty.

Diemond looked confident as she came to the ring. Karen Q slapped Diemond’s hand away before the match. Women of Honor World Champion Sumie Sakai came out to observe the two. 

These two looked great together. Q was quick and flashy with great charisma. Diemond seemed pretty advanced, and though she was taller than Q, she moved in a way that had them feeling like equals.

Q won with a modified Boston Crab and qualified for the four corner survival match for the Women of Honor title at Final Battle.

Afterwards, Sakai and Q jaw-jacked and got into a scuffle. Kelly Klein ran to the ring from the announce booth and Madison Rayne followed her out. Chaos ensued, wrapping up with Sakai diving off the turnbuckle onto all of the wrestlers. Sakai and Rayne faced off in the ring after the pull-apart.

This match was a great opener and could have gone an extra few minutes. The pull-apart got a lot of heat, but the verbiage between Kelly Klein and Q was embarrassing (e.g. “That’s gonna be my belt!”). It’d work if people actually spoke that way. 

Hangman Page defeated Chuck Taylor

Rhett Titus came out wearing a bikini and a hockey helmet. He joined the announce team for this match.

I wholly do not understand what went through the minds of the people who composed Page’s theme music. It sounds like the credits scene of an ‘80s action movie. Is that supposed to be his character?

They had a great exchange at the beginning of this match. Taylor apologized for pulling Page’s hair. He then challenged Page to a chop battle and lost to a shoulder block, if that makes any sense.

Taylor whipped Page twice around the ring into the guardrails. Page did a Shooting Star shoulder block to the floor but landed on his feet; Taylor then gave him a hard flatliner. The crowd was pretty awake at this point.

Taylor used a standing Sliced Bread for two. He cheesed into the camera and gave a thumbs-up as he tried to pin Page. They had a hot sequence before the match ended where Taylor went for the Awful Waffle but Page used the Rite of Passage to win. People around ringside jumped from their seats in shock, so I imagine Taylor landed hard. We couldn’t see it on the hard cam. 

This was a very good match that could have gone longer. They could have a great title program together somewhere in the future.

Tetsuya Naito & BUSHI defeated The Kingdom (Vinny Marseglia & TK O’Ryan)

Caprice Coleman took over for Titus on commentary for this match.

BUSHI and Naito got loud reactions. There were lots of “Naito” and “L-I-J” chants before the match. BUSHI teased a handshake with Marseglia before the match but pulled back.

People liked when BUSHI strangled Marseglia with his shirt, and when Naito did the Tranquilo pose, but booed a ton for the Kingdom when they started breaking all the LIJ taunts up. This crowd needs their taunts.

When O’Ryan threw Naito out of the ring, the cameras pulled back and exposed even more empty bleachers inside the venue.

The Kingdom worked Naito over for a long while. Coleman explained that the Kingdom were so dominant in this match because it was a “single tag team match,” which is what I thought they all were. Don’t start doing the math on that one or you’ll end up in Scott Steiner territory.

The Kingdom did House of a Thousand Horses but only got a two-count on BUSHI, who moments later blew mist into O’Ryan’s face. This later allowed Naito to use a Destino on Marseglia for the win. 

Matt Taven came out after and attacked LIJ. He especially put the boots to Naito until Christopher Daniels came out and made the save. This all overlapped into the match between Taven and Daniels.

Matt Taven defeated Christopher Daniels

Daniels busted out an Arabian Press early on. 48-years-old; spectacular. Taven used Just the Tip and later a huge Falcon Arrow for two.

Dalton Castle came out with The Boys and joined Cabana and Coleman on commentary; he kicked Riccaboni out. He did mostly comedy color commentary and told a story about how Taven once ate all of his butternut squash soup while he was in the bathroom, which is the impetus for their feud, I guess.

The Kingdom came back out and tried to smash Daniels in the face with a belt. Referee Todd Sinclair did his best to break things up, but while he dealt with the Kingdom members, Taven kicked Daniels in the groin, then used a Climax on Daniels for the win.

This was a decent match. Taven and Daniels were solid for the most part, but the crowd lost interest in the middle and sounded sour on the screw-job finish. 

The Briscoes defeated SANADA & EVIL

The crowd chanted for EVIL before the bell. He and Mark Briscoe started the match. They did a great spot where EVIL put Mark in a full nelson, he couldn’t break it, and he walked over to the ropes for the break. It was simple but effective, and it made EVIL look more physically powerful than he usually does.

There were more chants for EVIL as the match went on. The Briscoes felt like old school heels in this match; Mark bore a stark resemblance to toothless Canadian legend, Mad Dog Vachon, as he strangled SANADA in the corner.

The Briscoes dominated much of this. SANADA dove to his corner for a tag to EVIL, but the Briscoes had already attacked him. He did finally tag in EVIL, who played the part of charismatic leader in this match.

SANADA put both Briscoes in Paradise Locks and the crowd popped big for both dropkicks to their respective Sandy Fork asses. Mark later used a blockbuster to the outside, and Jay later used a Jay Driller on SANADA for the pin after Mark distracted the ref with a chair.

This was quite good, but the crowd wasn’t awake for it until LIJ started doing the spots they’re known for. As the Briscoes posed after their win, EVIL attacked the Briscoes with a chair, sating the crowd.

Flip Gordon defeated Jonathan Gresham

Silas Young came out to do commentary and push his angle with Bully Ray. 

Gresham and Gordon shook hands before the bell. They started with some smooth chain wrestling that popped the crowd. Gordon did a tope suicida early and sold his knee here as though he seriously injured it. Gordon and Sinclair did a great job putting this over; it even quieted most of the crowd initially.

Gresham began working over Gordon’s left knee. He did the rolling half-crab Lance Storm used to use. The two later did a rolling sunset flip, spinning back-and-forth and back again in a circle. The crowd liked this. 

Gordon spent a lot of time attempting moves he usually does, like the standing moonsault, but couldn’t do them because of his kayfabe injured knee. Gresham did a top rope frankensteiner, but later Gordon was able to finish Gresham off with a Flip 5.

This was short but very good. Gordon’s selling was excellent and Gresham’s reluctant handshake after the match was a nice touch.

Gordon grabbed the mic and challenged Bully Ray to an I Quit match, even though Ray was “fired” a few nights ago. The crowd chanted “What?!” after everything Gordon said.

ROH Tag Team Champions SoCal Uncensored (Scorpio Sky & Frankie Kazarian) defeated The Super Smash Bros (Stu Grayson & Evil Uno) to retain their titles

Sky did his “Worst Town Ever” bit. Daniels cut a promo talking about the prestige of ROH and said that SCU wants to defend the tag titles against the best in the world. Both teams were over with the crowd, but SCU were obviously the stars.

Kazarian and Grayson started the match. There was solid action between these two until Sky and Uno took over. Sky’s mat wrestling and chain movements were noticeably good. 

Uno later kneed Kazarian in the face in the corner, but he blatantly slapped his thigh beforehand. The impact of the slap and the actual contact of his knee were out of synch. 

Grayson used a High Fly Flow on Sky. Kazarian did a flying frankensteiner to the floor, which advantageously ended up spearing Grayson into Uno on the floor. Check the highlights for that one. 

Smash Bros did some cool tag work together. In terms of function, Grayson was Bret Hart, Uno was Jim Neidhart.

The teams did a double Frye-Takayama spot. Grayson launched himself over the corner onto Kazarian on the outside and the crowd went nuts. Uno used a swanton. SSB got an extremely close two-count and the crowd started booing.

Kazarian and Sky came back and finished Grayson off with a new finisher: Sky did a high angle uranage/Rock Bottom while Kazarian did a lungblower. The teams shook hands after this.

Another solid match but sloppy in spots. The crowd again didn’t come alive until the end. They seemed to be convinced they were going to see a title change but no dice on that one. 

Juice Robinson defeated Beretta

Robinson received a few chants at the start of this one. He did the Terry Funk jabs. They brawled on the floor for a while; Robinson broke the 20-count and missed a cannonball into the barriers and it looked crazy. 

Even though he missed, the crowd chanted “Juice!” afterwards. Beretta did a double stomp off of the barrier. Robinson cut his back on the barrier and there was a roughly five-inch gash on his right lower back. He did a standing senton after this. Not the best idea for someone who just cut their back open, but hey.

Beretta did a somersault senton over to the outside and sold his ribs. He tried a crossbody block from the top, but Robinson countered it with a codebreaker. Great timing on that spot. 

Beretta did a pretty tornado DDT that Robinson sold with crossed eyes. He got a very close two-count after a brutal Bomaye to the back of Robinson’s head. 

Riccaboni did his best to put moments in this match over on commentary, but the crowd didn’t always match his enthusiasm. They were polite but mostly quiet until the end.

Beretta actually used two piledrivers on Robinson in this match, and one was to the outside. It wasn’t enough, though, as Robinson countered with a straight left punch and a Pulp Friction for the win.

Robinson got on the mic and cut a quick promo saying he is coming for Cody’s IWGP United States Heavyweight title. 

Both wrestlers tried really hard here. It was a decent match, but it didn’t have the star power or high stakes it needed to ignite the crowd.

The Young Bucks defeated Time Machine (Chris Sabin & KUSHIDA)

Sabin & KUSHIDA received a tepid reaction. The crowd did a variety of Young Bucks/Elite-centric chants. 

Nick Jackson and KUSHIDA started the match; KUSHIDA got a small chant. The two were great together for a minute or so, then Matt joined the fun. 

The Bucks launched into their usual tag sequences with KUSHIDA. The crowd at one point was chanting “This is awesome” and Matt only had KUSHIDA in an armbar; the crowd made their mind up beforehand, apparently. 

Sabin later joined the match and he and KUSHIDA went through a few of their own tag sequences. They’re finally beginning to feel like an established tag team, though it’s unfortunately come after the NJPW Junior Tag League.

This crowd was weird. They only seemed to respond to big spots or upon being cued in by the wrestlers themselves. It felt like the crowd would periodically check out, particularly when Sabin or KUSHIDA were on the offensive. That’s the other edge of the sword in babyface vs. babyface tag matches, that fans don’t want to boo the other team because they like them, so instead they sat quietly. 

More Bang for Your Buck didn’t pan out for the Young Bucks. KUSHIDA and Sabin hit Made in Osaka for two. This didn’t lead to anything, either, and we then went on a road trip to Superkick City. 

The Bucks used a Five-Star Meltzer Driver for what seemed to be the win, but KUSHIDA broke up the pin. Matt Jackson was able to slap on a sharpshooter and Sabin eventually tapped.

A good match that would have died if the Bucks weren’t in it. While Time Machine looked tighter and more crisp than they have together basically ever, the crowd wanted to see the Young Bucks do cool moves and win.

ROH World Champion Jay Lethal defeated Kenny King to retain his title

They played pre-taped promos from Lethal and King. Lethal’s was terrific and the delivery was top-notch; King’s was fine.

King came out to little reaction. Lethal got tons of streamers thrown in the ring for him. When Bobby Cruise announced that this was for the ROH World title, the crowd made a sound that I can only describe as a human ellipsis. 

King jumped Lethal before the bell. He did a few kicks and then a tornillo to the outside. He worked over Lethal for a long while and the crowd booed a bit but was mostly silent until Lethal took the match’s reins.

King used a brutal suplex with a high-crotch and dumped Lethal head-first into the second turnbuckle. He did a spinebuster after this and both moves looked really good.

King tried hard to get the crowd upset with him. He succeeded, sort of. To those who wait, as I heard somewhere. 

King teased using the title as a weapon on Lethal until Todd Sinclair stopped him. There were more submission/rope break/taunt sequences from King. He spit on Lethal and it got heat, but he ruined it by screaming WWE-inspired verbiage (e.g. “I’ve trained my whole life for this!”).

Lethal used a running Death Valley Driver, but King reversed it into a pin. King did the Royal Flush but couldn’t finish. He missed a Shooting Star Press, then Lethal did a Lethal Injection for another very close two. The crowd came back and finally started chanting “This is awesome” here.

Lethal began an excessive beatdown onto King. He accidentally knocked Sinclair over. King grabbed the belt but Lethal knocked it away. King then pinned Lethal for three — but his foot was on the ropes. Sinclair saw it and waved the finish off. Lethal hit the Lethal Injection a few moments later for the win.

Aside from the hot finish, this match was bad. King as the heel led the match and it was mostly slow and not in a reasonable way, it was just slow and not very good.