AEW Dark results: Dark Order vs. 2point0, Daniel Garcia & Serpentico

It’s Tuesday and you know what that mean. This week’s matches were taped this past weekend in Miami, FL, with Excalibur and Taz on the call.

Jamie Hayter (w/ Dr. Britt Baker & Rebel) defeated Tiffany Nieves (0:58)

In a match over so quickly that it could have been in the Queen’s Crown tournament, Hayter got the pin after a short-arm clothesline. 

Gunn Club defeated Diamond Sheik, Dean Alexander and Alex Chamberlain (2:55) 

The Younger Gunns looked like they were wearing Shawn Michaels inspired tights. They were ostensibly heels here, but Billy Gunn gave the fans a big “Suck it!” gesture and they popped like mad. I get that Billy likes teaming with his kids but at some point, we have to see what the sons can do without him. Colton got the pin on Chamberlain with the Colt 45 neckbreaker. 

Kris Statlander, Thunder Rosa and Red Velvet defeated Diamante, Nyla Rose and Emi Sakura (w/ Vickie Guerrero & Lulu Pencil) (4:01) 

Thankfully, Velvet didn’t try hitting a Spanish fly in this match. 

Statlander found herself in trouble early after a backdrop suplex from Rose. She came back with a fallaway slam on Diamante and got the tag to Rosa, who got a huge pop. She and Rose went one-on-one and Rosa was dominant, hitting a dropkick in the corner. Rose got the tag to Sakura who got a near fall with a face-first double underhook suplex. Then, all pandemonium broke loose: Rose rocked Rosa with a chokeslam, Diamante hit a code red on Statlander and Velvet hit the final slice on Sakura to get the pinfall. 

— Jade Cargill and “Smart” Mark Sterling did an in-ring promo. Sterling ran down all of Cargill’s potential opponents in the TBS title tournament and Cargill threatened to walk Thunder Rosa like a dog. Okay, then. She said that TBS is going to be “That Bitch Show” when Cargill wins the TBS title. 

Lance Archer (w/ Jake Roberts) defeated O.T. Fernandez 

Eddie Kingston was on commentary for this match. 

Archer dragged Fernandez out to the ring during the entrances and tossed Fernandez into the ring. When he tried to come off the top rope with an offensive move, Archer caught him on the entrance ramp and chokeslammed him back into the ring. Fernandez tried a crossbody off the top and got punched out of the air for his troubles. The Blackout got Archer the win who disrespectfully pinned his opponent with one foot. He moves on to face Kingston in the World title eliminator tournament.

Frankie Kazarian defeated Aaron Solo (w/ Nick Comoroto) (5:54) 

This match was a bit disappointing. QT Marshall joined the commentary team for this one.

Comoroto just hung around ringside and interfered. He feels wasted in this role. His interference gave Solo the advantage as he hit a double foot stomp but it barely got a one count. Kazarian came back with a clothesline, a leg lariat and a flying forearm. Solo went for a move that looked suspiciously like a Pedigree, but Kazarian backdropped him and hit a middle rope leg drop for a near fall.

Comoroto got on the apron to distract Kazarian and Solo went for an O’Connor roll, but Kazarian and Solo collided with Comoroto. In the confusion, Kazarian locked in the crossface and got the submission. Important note for hopeful Comoroto fans like me: on commentary, Marshall blamed Comoroto’s failed interference for the loss. 

Dark Order (Stu Grayson, Colt Cabana, Alan “5” Angels & 10) defeated 2point0, Daniel Garcia and Serpentico (6:31) 

Did Cabana ever get a number? Maybe he can be “2” since he’s from the Second City. 

The story of this match was Serpentico trying to interject himself in the match and it generally not going well for him. 

Angels looked pretty good early, but wound up taking a long beating from the heels. Serpentico tagged himself in and got caught with a Spanish fly from Angels, who got the tag to 10 which meant pump kicks for everyone! Grayson got the tag and hit a crossbody off of Vance’s shoulder on Garcia. He followed that with a military press into a powerslam for two. Grayson got hit with a pop-up spear from 2point0 for a near fall. 2point0 then got into an argument with Serpentico and Grayson hit a double Pele kick on 2point0.

Serpentico’s argument with 2point0 led to him being the legal man against the Dark Order. Angels hit a moonsault on the other heels on the floor to take them out. Serpentico was quickly overwhelmed by the resurgent Dark Order.  He managed to avoid several attempts at the flip, flop & fly bionic elbow from Cabana, so Cabana finally just tossed him over to 10, who caught him in the full nelson for the submission win.

Final Thoughts: 

I like these shorter Darks. Although on these weeks where Dynamite isn’t airing in its regular time slot, I think they would want to feature a little stronger card (though not necessarily a two-hour one) for thirsty AEW fans who can’t wait for Friday night. 

This was a fun show but an unmemorable one with nothing worth going out of your way to seek out.